Thursday, February 19, 2009

Tim Blair, Pure Poison, Nazis, Monkeys, the New York Post and tax cuts

Feisty gadfly (okay raving ratbag) Tim Bleagh is itching for a fight. It seems that Crikey has decided to launch a new blog, aptly titled Pure Poison, dealing with the likes of Blair, but supposedly also with recalcitrant lefties like the utterly tedious and self-aggrandising Phillip Adams (thus breaking from the standard mould of a Crooks and Liars or Huffington Post, but missing the bullseye by confessing they haven't actually got any examples of leftie lunacy. Guys, guys, shoot yourselves in the foot why don't you).

Also a little unwisely, the PP guys immediately broke Godwin's Law, by referencing Czechoslovakia and Poland, giving Blair an easy shot back about someone in a Hamas rally carrying a Nazi sign.

Of course Blair thus breaks Godwin's law, but he doesn't give a fuck about the fair laws of a debating society. He likes the jugular, the carotid artery, the fangs in the neck.

At the same time, you won't find Blair carrying on about Michelle Malkin, that American loon from the right, being caught out at a Republican get together smirking along with a guy carrying a swastika on a placard. (No no no, the Klu Klux Klan is just one of those bonding social clubs that's received a bad press in the south).

Anyhoo, it's not the business of lesser speckled loons to be fair minded or even handed or balanced. Just to kick ass. That way they get to be the great speckled loon (so why won't they go live in Newfoundland?)

When Blair calls the PP guys selective Nazi-opposers, he's being just as selective, but what the fuck, they're lefties. Nah, nah, you're a bunch of losers and wankers. Nothing like a knock down argument to win a fight. Of course I've also broken Godwin's law, but there's no point in actually arguing or debating with Blair. You might as well tackle the school yard bully, and we know where that got Michael Palin in his Ripping Yarns ep Tomkinson's Schooldays - I say you dismally untalented little leftie creep, you spotty little oik, let me nail you to that cross.

Anyhoo, why have a debate with a cosmic clown and addled brained petrol head? 

It's much more fun just to watch his contortions. A good example is the New York Post cartoon (see above) where a couple of cops take out a chimp on one page, with the caption "They'll have to find someone else to write the next stimulus bill". The cartoon just happens to follow a previous page photo of Obama signing the stimulus bill.

The newspaper's since backpedalled at the response it got - citing a crazed chimp attack as the main inspiration, along with a generalised cocking of the snout at Washington's stimulus bill - but Blair's modus operandi isn't to actually worry about what the paper might have been up to. Not the Post, not the sun king's Page Six guide to smut and sleaze and sordid gossip. 

You'd have to suspect they were testing the line, pushing the boundaries to see how far they could go. And people caught the drift.

But Blair's never about what might have actually happened or why. He just wants a reflexive, dumb fuck, knee jerk reaction. So he digs up some cartoon images of George Bush as a chimp, and throws in a jolly jape at The Guardian, calling it Britain's leading monkeytoon journal. QED. It's lefties who are the monkeys.

So if there's shit on one side, it's okay to do shit on another side, and sometimes a monkey is just a monkey, and sometimes it's pretty clear that these Negrahs are pretty sensitive. Can't think why. Boy bring me another mint julep, ah's thirsty from all o' the typing.

Laugh, I cacked myself I did, cops blowing away a chimp. Funny or what. That Glock'll teach those PETA freaks a lesson or two.

And boy how the dog whistling works. All the loons come out of the woodwork in Blair's comments section, cracking monkey jokes and sending up everybody and everything in sight, just the way loon in chief Blair likes. 

It's a cavalcade of loons. Send in the clowns, oh don't bother, they're here.

Which makes it irresistible for me to run this nice cartoon by R J Matson in the St. Louis Post, combining as it does natural selection and tax cuts. Now that's clever cartooning, but don't expect Blair to laugh. When your face muscles are frozen on the left side of your face, laughing's a real chore.

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