Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Tim Blair, Rupert Murdoch, a personal apology, lead foots and zombies

Shock! Horror! Rupert 'the sun king' Murdoch personally apologizes for New York Post chimp shooting cartoon. "Today I want to personally apologize to any reader who felt offended, and even insulted", said the head honcho in a statement released to those who care.

Read all about it in Tim Blair's up to the minute, scintillating, informative, even-handed, balanced and racially unbiased blog in The Daily Terror, a minor supplier of fish and chip wrapping paper in the byways of old Sydney town.

Oh wait. Don't bother. The latest from Tim is a re-hash of a dolphin joke, and a smirky aside that Barack Obama's approval rating is down to 59% under the tasteful header, "It's probably something to do with racism", and a  hilarious piece about the eating habits of the partner of a greenie politician at council meetings, along with a boast about how Tim talked himself out of a speeding ticket.

What is it with right wing loons? Both Blair and our own esteemed Michael Duffy are petrol head lead foots with a penchant for confessing to collecting speeding tickets (or not, as the case may be, depending how creative and gabby they are, or how they can titillate a cop by explaining they really are on the side of police rights in a police state). 

How come it's okay to be a law-breaker on the roads, and a righteous prick off them complaining about the lack of civility in secular society? Maybe Tim Blair was that bastard tail gating me on the M5 the other day? Who knows?

In further news, News Ltd shares are down a further 4% after the market heard that 2IC Peter Chernin is leaving the company. Rumors of mergers filter through the ether, the world might be shifting under Col Allan's feet, Faux Noise is losing money, the crunch is hitting the old fox, Australia was a turkey dragging down Australia and Fox ... 

Questions, questions: Does Rupe dare to ask Obama for a helping hand? How many loons would then immediately feel the need to jump off a nearby bridge? (Maps with diagrams and easy guides to nearest bridge available here right now, free. Just sayin', just plannin', just thinkin' ahead, just tryin' to help folks).

Oh it's a good news day.

Come on down righteous Hedgehoppers Anonymous, I feel a song coming on:

It's good news week
Someone's dropped a bomb somewhere
Contaminating atmosphere
And blackening the sky

It's good news week
Someone's found a way to give
The rotting dead a will to live
Go on and never die ...

Will zombie newspapers now join the zombie banks strutting the post industrial devastated landscape? And will zombie columnists still work for the zombie papers? And will lefties and greenies and despicable loons like that get a chance to play a sequel to that great Xbox 360 game Dead Rising? It was set in the middle of a giant America mall but I'm thinking we need to riff on a new setting. 

I can hear the voice over start the narrative in a new fresh downbeat kind of way: "Hi my name's Randy Stone, I cover the nightbeat for the Chicago Star. Stories start in many different ways. This one started with a zombie proprietor and ended with the four horsemen of the apocalypse."

We could call it Loons Rising ...

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